| 2017-12-07 05:12:05 |
Breeding My Widowed Aunt Rose
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Liked the story, but learn how to write dialogue. |
| 2018-01-21 21:03:32 |
"You missed a bit"
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Learn to use spell check |
| 2018-02-02 16:36:49 |
Jenny has some questions_(1)
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Who's Jenny and who's Britney? You kept mixing them up. Choose a name and stick with it. I get that there are two different girls but you used the names interchangeably. Figure out who you're writing about and make sure you stay with that name. |
| 2018-02-08 05:53:19 |
The Academy_(2)
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Not bad, but you only create a new line for dialogue when you switch speakers. Other than that you're golden. |
| 2018-02-12 02:58:51 |
The Fighter Series, Round 1
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Maybe detail the fight at the beginning, I wanted to know more. A little more sex and figure out how to write dialogue. But other than those little things I loved it. |